Blank

Have you ever had that feeling of emptiness?, nothingness?, dark, void, black,  ... total BLANK!!! never?? ... well thats one feeling you will never experience because you are just not ME!

I dont say its positive not being me, (even though it is, cuz that makes me alone and unique, and uuh ... special n all ... get my point?? ;) ) ... still the point is I dont say it in THAT sense. What I mean is that you wont understand how it feels like being empty, because most of the people are not, and I am generalizing YOU as any other common homo-sapien. Still, my point is that there are many things about being blank, MANY ... trust me!

Staying blank is like being filled with a whole of nothingness entirely. Its not being 'dumb'. there is a difference. 'dumb' is different. thats when you dont have the capacity to think, so you dont think. but this is different. You just jont know what to do, what the freck to say, even though you have many things running through your head, insane. I mean how can the human mind be blank? There is a difference between blank and idle mind... as they say: "an idle mind is a devil's workshop", but "a blank mind is noone's workshop" ... god, I mean not even a devil's?? Atleast an idle mind is a devil's workshop, but this ... come on.

By blank I just dont mean just 'blank'. Its blank in every sense. Sometimes, I jus sit on the terrace or on top of a hill and jus look. Thats all I do, 'look'. Its like I have that weird feeling that my body is seperated from my mind or something. Its just that 'nonthingness'. The brain refuses to do any thinking work. I will be like "come on", and my brain like "Piss off". What the hell? I usually dont care and just 'remain' there. Else sometimes when I am supposed to comment on something, like when someone said something, or someone looks good (or just ok, but they are expecting a comment from me), I stay blank. Actually I dont want to say anything then. But this is also a kind of 'blank'. Third, is when I stand in front of some girl who looks damn beautiful or hot or something, my mind shuts down. I freeze, and the interesting part is that I dont know what to think also. I mean, nothing runs in my brain. I just keep looking at her, staring rather. Thats weird. I know and I have to get over with this really fast.

So many weird things happen in my life. Or rather is it that I am weird. I dont care anyway, it doesnt matter because I dont give a shit! I live my way. Thats all. Still why did I say that now? Anyways, thing is that there are many dimentions in one's life that are, like weird, they dont matter much in the purpose of your life, they are not worth talking or thinking about, but still people like me blog about it not knowing what to do about it. Yet, nothing matters you know... they are just things. 

Adieu!